Hope in despair

photo credit: pexels.com

~Written on 7/28~

I feel really drained today. I had a little episode last night, I let my emotions get the best of me. I really need to learn how to center my feelings, and not let them run all crazy in the moment. I should digest the situation, sit on it for a sec and then react. I'm extremely sensitive, and no matter how hard I try to change that part of myself, it just ain't happening. I can cry very easily if I am wounded by someone that I love, because I love super hard. I could care less if a stranger (or someone who I don't care about) tries to hurt me, but when it's someone who I extremely care about? Oh boy. Yeah, I need to train my mind (and heart, girl, let's be real) to get a grip and toughen up. I'll still remain sensitive, but I need some shield of protection for that lil sucker!

You know what did work though? Praying. I prayed, and in the absolute stillness of the night, I could feel Gods voice telling me that everything will be okay. I felt peace wash over me, and I was able to fall asleep in an instant. Although I still woke up feeling like I was ran over by a train, God came through like always when I needed His comfort.

I know my source of peace, always have and always will. I just tend to forget it at times. 

I'm working on it...He will make beauty out of ashes.